Healing & Growth

April 8, 2014

Facing Unavoidable Pain

We make meaning out of tragedy. But the tragedy is still tragic.

August 20, 2013

10 Levels of Wounding and How to Heal Them

Pain comes in many forms, and the key to healing is finding the right remedy for what you are experiencing. This post attempts to diagram all the kinds of psychological, emotional, and spiritual wounding I know of and the best remedies I have found for each.

August 4, 2013

Living With Death: Making Sense of Suicide

Emily, my partner, my love, took her own life on Wednesday, July 31st, 2013. Below my letter is Emily’s good-bye note. I’m writing

June 14, 2013

Limbic Templates: How to Change Deep Patterns

Our limbic system is our body’s emotional-relational system. Some places it shows up: when you feel awkward when you don’t like someone

March 20, 2013

The world can’t wait to meet you

Today I was given the exercise to write “Things I wish my Mom had said to me”, and then say them to

February 18, 2013

Who are you living for?

These days I’m working on untangling a core pattern that goes like this: My life has meaning only if I’m helping people.

February 3, 2013

Cultivating Self-Worth

It’s one of the jobs of a parent to instill a child with a sense of their own worth. This happens naturally

January 30, 2013

The Joy Manifesto

There are creations only you can bring into the world. There is a purpose for your life–one that nobody else can fulfill.

November 27, 2012

Lumping and Splitting – Learning from Dog Training

I just discovered these terms used in animal training. From the blog Eileen and Dogs: Splitting is to look for and reinforce small

February 10, 2012

Trigger Calming Magic

When you are triggered, your autonomic nervous system is reacting to messages from your brain that you are in danger. Our body’s

December 9, 2011

Working With Regret

Regret is one of the hardest emotions we can feel. It can be a relief to realize that regret is a secondary emotion, and by addressing the primary feelings regret can be released.

June 9, 2011

Cultivating Self-Discipline is Best Done Gently

Self-discipline is tricky. In the movies, there is always a big motivating factor, and then a montage of activity toward a goal,

May 15, 2011

Accepting Our Brokenness Helps Us Heal

Start where you are. It is enough.

May 14, 2011

Healing Hyper-vigilance and Learning Peace

Those who grow up in an environment that is not safe (whether physically or emotionally) develop a heightened sense of threat. They

Book Review: SHED Your Stuff, Change Your Life

Like her earlier book Organizing from the Inside Out, Julie Morgenstern takes an inner approach to working with clutter. Instead of  tough-love

May 11, 2011

Handling Confusion and Uncertainty With Grace

To live with grace, we have to trust grace to show up for us if we let go. 

May 8, 2011

Has Your Ego Co-Opted Your Growth Work?

As a self-proclaimed self-help junkie, I can attest that it can get confusing. Am I becoming happier or learning more ways to

April 30, 2011

How to Defuse a Trigger

To actively defuse a trigger (instead of just letting it wear itself out), you must stay aware during the process that you

April 29, 2011

Cultivate Neutrality in the Face of Triggers

We all have triggers: situations that bring up old feelings that are out of proportion to the current experience. There are two