Healing & Growth

November 4, 2021

Self-Loathing Serves a Purpose (and How to Heal)

Why our mind inflicts pain on itself and how to make it stop.

October 12, 2021

How to Meet Your Own Emotional Needs

Giving up my healing fantasy of emotional rescue and learning to give myself the validation I always needed.

June 24, 2021

Don’t Hold Your Present Hostage To Your Past

You have no power over the past. But you do have power over your present.

June 18, 2021

How to Process Trauma By Yourself (Without Therapy)

Processing trauma isn’t nearly as complicated as it often sounds.

June 15, 2021

False Spirituality and Self-Delusion

“Meant to be” can easily become a way to disempower ourselves.

June 12, 2021

Conscious Coping – Let Yourself Have It

Guilt and self-criticism do not improve your behavior. You can love yourself, even when you’re not perfect.

June 10, 2021

When “Feel Your Feelings” Doesn’t Work

Sometimes you are just reinforcing negative beliefs.

June 8, 2021

The Hell that is Fearful-Avoidant Attachment (and How to Heal It)

Desperate to be loved, terrified to be seen.

June 7, 2021

It Was Never About You

We end up holding ourselves hostage to the meaning we give things. Change your story, change your life.

June 4, 2021

Healing School Trauma

Preparing kids “for the real world” by traumatizing them is ridiculous.

June 3, 2021

Finding the Light

The darkness doesn’t spawn demons. We do.

June 1, 2021

You Can’t Become a Better Person

Healing is about remembering you are already whole.

December 3, 2015

When your world falls apart, can you still love yourself?

Life, pain, God, and loving yourself and the world with such fierceness that you find the state of Grace.

February 3, 2015

Enduring Pain You Cannot Change: My Life as a Prison Wife

Wherein I get everything my heart desires and am still unhappy. But not for the reasons you’re thinking.

April 8, 2014

Facing Unavoidable Pain

We make meaning out of tragedy. But the tragedy is still tragic.

August 20, 2013

10 Levels of Wounding and How to Heal Them

Pain comes in many forms, and the key to healing is finding the right remedy for what you are experiencing. This post attempts to diagram all the kinds of psychological, emotional, and spiritual wounding I know of and the best remedies I have found for each.

August 4, 2013

Living With Death: Making Sense of Suicide

Emily, my partner, my love, took her own life on Wednesday, July 31st, 2013. Below my letter is Emily’s good-bye note. I’m writing

June 14, 2013

Limbic Templates: How to Change Deep Patterns

Our limbic system is our body’s emotional-relational system. Some places it shows up: when you feel awkward when you don’t like someone

March 20, 2013

The world can’t wait to meet you

Today I was given the exercise to write “Things I wish my Mom had said to me”, and then say them to

February 18, 2013

Who are you living for?

These days I’m working on untangling a core pattern that goes like this: My life has meaning only if I’m helping people.