Free yourself.
I write about the art of self-liberation: do-it-yourself healing and personal growth. I seek unbridled joy and unconditional happiness. These are notes and tips from my journey.Join me, if you'd like!
Hi, Iām Emma. I am always seeking the real deal—truth, depth, and authenticity. I seek the Light while embracing the shadow for what it can teach us. I hope I can inspire you to align with your truth and live your joy, without apology.
Principles of Self-liberation
- Love yourself fiercely. Develop a relationship with yourself based on genuine love and support rather than fear, criticism, and forcing yourself to do things. Be your own best friend. Inner peace comes when you end the inner war.
- Learn how brains work. Brains become conditioned and can be reconditioned (changed). See your thoughts with neutrality and your feelings with detached compassion. Don't believe everything you feel, but honor the part that feels it. Don't take your mind too seriously, because when you do, it makes it harder to change it.
- Hold beliefs lightly. Both beliefs about yourself, and about the world. Have "best guesses" and "working theories", not beliefs. Nobody really knows what is going on here, and the more humility you can bring to everything, the easier it is to be flexible, adapt, grow, learn, and enjoy life.
- Practice radical forgiveness. Everything you have done was your best guess at how to meet your needs at the time, given your subjective context. The same is true of everyone else. You have no idea what anyone else is living with inside their own minds, and they don't know what you're living with. So just walk your own path in peace.
New Posts
How to Use ChatGPT for Self-Therapy, Self-Coaching, and Personal Growth
Three examples of using ChatGPT for self-therapy and self-coaching, with full prompts and responses.
Why Healing Can Feel Like Self-Betrayal
If you heal, does that mean you are letting the people who hurt you off the hook?
The Layer Cake of Sustainable Motivation
Learn why creative & intuitive types can get stuck around motivation, and how to create that sweet, sweet alignment that makes you excited to jump out of bed in the morning.
Intro to State Shifting: Choosing to Be Happy Anyway
Shifting from a bad mood to a good mood is both easier and harder than it sounds.
The Moment Healing Happens In Your Mind
The moment when your brain offers you an interpretation based in trauma and you choose reality instead.
Healing Clutter: Trauma and the Tyranny of Aspirational Objects
How to withdraw your inner critic and aspirational fantasies from objects so you can let them go.
Healing Fantasies: Releasing the Longing to Be Rescued
Wherein I explain healing fantasies (aka redemption or salvation fantasies), the function they serve, my personal history with them, and what to do about them.
Self-Loathing Serves a Purpose (and How to Heal)
Why our mind inflicts pain on itself and how to make it stop.
How to Meet Your Own Emotional Needs Through Self-Validation
Giving up my healing fantasy of emotional rescue and learning to give myself the validation I always needed.
Don’t Hold Your Present Hostage To Your Past
You have no power over the past. But you do have power over your present.
How to Process Trauma By Yourself (Without Therapy)
Processing trauma isn’t nearly as complicated as it often sounds.
False Spirituality and Self-Delusion
“Meant to be” can easily become a way to disempower ourselves.
What to Do When Your Emotions Feel Out of Control
You don’t need to fight a battle against a ghost. All you need to do is see that it is a ghost.
Conscious Coping – Let Yourself Have It
Guilt and self-criticism do not improve your behavior. You can love yourself, even when you’re not perfect.
When “Feel Your Feelings” Doesn’t Work
Sometimes you are just reinforcing negative beliefs.
The Hell that is Fearful-Avoidant Attachment (and How to Heal It)
Desperate to be loved, terrified to be seen.
It Doesn’t Have to Mean That You’re Broken
We end up holding ourselves hostage to the meaning we give things. Change your story, change your life.
Healing School Trauma
Preparing kids “for the real world” by traumatizing them is ridiculous.
Darkness is Merely the Absence of Light
The darkness doesn’t spawn demons. We do.
You Can’t Become a Better Person
Healing is about remembering you are already whole.
