Freedom is an inside job.

I write about self-liberation: healing, personal growth, and self-empowerment.

For more recent writing, visit my newsletter at Sparkly Dark.

Hi, I’m Emma. I've been working on my own healing and walking a spiritual path for 20 years. I share what has worked for me in the hope that others can use it to heal and find their own authentic joy and power.

Where to Start

New Posts

September 11, 2023

I am autistic

This is a pretty big deal, so let me explain how I got here.

August 11, 2023

I guess I have ADHD after all

I only recognized myself when I started reading people reframing ADHD as neurodivergence, and even then it took me awhile to deconstruct the pathology language surrounding it.

August 1, 2023

Life update: divorce, burnout, new things

I’m through the hard, and ready to rock the internet again. Come find me on Substack or Facebook if you want to hang out!

March 22, 2023

How to Use ChatGPT for Self-Therapy, Self-Coaching, and Personal Growth

Three examples of using ChatGPT for self-therapy and self-coaching, with full prompts and responses.

March 6, 2023

Why Healing Can Feel Like Self-Betrayal

If you heal, does that mean you are letting the people who hurt you off the hook?

May 29, 2022

The Layer Cake of Sustainable Motivation

Learn why creative & intuitive types can get stuck around motivation, and how to create that sweet, sweet alignment that makes you excited to jump out of bed in the morning.

March 12, 2022

Intro to State Shifting: Choosing to Be Happy Anyway

Shifting from a bad mood to a good mood is both easier and harder than it sounds.

February 22, 2022

The Moment Healing Happens In Your Mind

The moment when your brain offers you an interpretation based in trauma and you choose reality instead.

February 9, 2022

Healing Clutter: Trauma and the Tyranny of Aspirational Objects

How to withdraw your inner critic and aspirational fantasies from objects so you can let them go.

December 11, 2021

Healing Fantasies: Releasing the Longing to Be Rescued

Wherein I explain healing fantasies (aka redemption or salvation fantasies), the function they serve, my personal history with them, and what to do about them.

November 4, 2021

Self-Loathing Serves a Purpose (and How to Heal)

Why our mind inflicts pain on itself and how to make it stop.

October 12, 2021

How to Meet Your Own Emotional Needs Through Self-Validation

Giving up my healing fantasy of emotional rescue and learning to give myself the validation I always needed.

June 24, 2021

Don’t Hold Your Present Hostage To Your Past

You have no power over the past. But you do have power over your present.

June 18, 2021

How to Process Trauma By Yourself (Without Therapy)

Processing trauma isn’t nearly as complicated as it often sounds.

June 15, 2021

False Spirituality and Self-Delusion

“Meant to be” can easily become a way to disempower ourselves.

June 14, 2021

How to Heal Core Belief-Fueled Emotional Reactivity

You don’t need to fight a battle against a ghost. All you need to do is see that it is a ghost.

June 12, 2021

Conscious Coping – Let Yourself Have It

Guilt and self-criticism do not improve your behavior. You can love yourself, even when you’re not perfect.

June 10, 2021

When “Feel Your Feelings” Doesn’t Work

Sometimes you are just reinforcing negative beliefs.

June 8, 2021

The Hell that is Fearful-Avoidant Attachment (and How to Heal It)

Desperate to be loved, terrified to be seen.

June 7, 2021

It Doesn’t Have to Mean That You’re Broken

We end up holding ourselves hostage to the meaning we give things. Change your story, change your life.